In the past few weeks, I’ve had some encounters that left many residual thoughts. I thought about if these were occurrences I still needed to make peace with and perhaps, what would suffice for atonement. I thought about what I would do differently if I could relive those particular moments and the longer I thought about them, the more thoughts manifested. I reached out to my circle to vent, listened to them and reflected. At the end of my reflection, I knew I had made the right choices and because of those choices, I am in a happy and fulfilling place. Yet, there I was throwing myself a pity party and apologizing for my growth.
Sometimes, people have a deliberate way of reminding us of where we once were in an attempt to dismiss where we are now but only if and when we allow them to do so. We ourselves sometimes think we must know ‘our place’ and ‘stay in it’. Not everyone or everything will be your ‘cup of tea’ and honestly, there is absolutely nothing wrong with that. It is very possible that what may have worked a year or even six months ago no longer does and again, there is nothing wrong with that. My circle has increased, decreased and been entirely reformed with new dots. There have been times when I’ve grieved and times I’ve celebrated but through all these experiences I have grown; willingly or unwillingly, pleasantly or painfully.
As we continue to experience growth in any and every area of our lives, our perspective, particularities, and preferences are likely to change. These changes are harder, for some of us than others, to accept but are inevitable. It can be painful and difficult to embrace but is one of the greatest processes we undergo. When we ignore or are afraid to accept these changes, we ultimately stifle our growth. I am guilty, in my capacity as judge and juror, of handing down too many life sentences to myself for my choices and delaying action. However, I am inexplicably grateful and blessed to have a circle that won’t let me drown in sorrow. Whatever you do in all you do, do not apologize for your growth! And if something isn’t your cup of tea because you drink champagne now, no need to apologize for that either!
Learning. Being. Becoming